Rocky Horror P&P3

Prop List

• Wine glass
• Fan
• Handkerchief/napkin
• Squirt gun
• Ribbons
• Exemplary vegetable

Some recurring items

• Say anything in bold italics aloud.
• Giggle and squeal with Kitty and Lydia.
• Handkerchief moments (a.k.a., "HM"), where you will use your impressively versatile handkerchief for various purposes.
• Make appropriate fowl and animal noises when they are on screen.
• Look down your nose with Miss Bingley or, alternately, hiss at anything she says.

Scenes

1. Longbourn
   • Twitter with the birds, moo with the cows, honk with the geese, quack with the ducks, cluck with the chickens, bark with the dog.
   • Giggle with Kitty and Lydia
   • After Lydia says, "Five thousand a year!," say "He's SINGLE!" with her and Kitty.
   • Squeal after Mr. Bennet says, "I believe so."
2. The Meryton Assembly
   • Clap along with the dancers!
   • train your neck to see the painted peacocks' entrance.
   • With Mr. Bennet, say, "She's going to take the veil," and then take a long, much-needed swig from your wine glass.
   • Squeal about the officers coming to Meryton.
   • After Darcy says, "Not if I can help it," hiss at him.
   • After Darcy says, "You're wasting your time with me," hiss at him again.
   • Fan yourself or your neighbor whenever Mrs. Bennet needs it.
   • Whoop, clap, whatever you feel is appropriate after Lizzy says to Darcy, "Dancing. Even if one's partner is barely tolerable."
3. Back at Longbourn
   • HM: Join Lizzy and Jane under the covers.
   • After Betsy says, "A letter addressed to Miss Bennet, ma'am, from Netherfield Hall," gasp.
   • After Mrs. Bennet says, "Certainly not. She'll go on horseback," say, "HORSEBACK?!?" with Lizzy and Jane.
   • Provide more rain for Elizabeth and Jane with your squirt gun.
   • Cluck with the chickens.
   • After Lizzy says, "But she may well perish with the shame of having such a mother," snap her with one of your ribbons for saying such a thing.
4. Netherfield
   • After Miss Bingley snipes, "My goodness, did you see her hem?," say "Six inches deep in mud," along with her.
   • HM: Shield your eyes from the offensive sight of Mr. Bingley gazing at Jane in bed.
5. Longbourn (where the pig is most assuredly not in the house!)
   • HM: Shield your eyes from the possibly disturbing sight of a fine specimen of a pig.
6. The militia arrives in Meryton
   • Giggle with Kitty and Lydia.
   • HM: Wave your handkerchief at the officers, then toss it, and be affronted when no one picks it up.
7. Back at Netherfield
   • Roll your eyes at virtually everything Miss Bingley says.
   • Hiss when Miss Bingley says, "A family trait, I think."
   • Gasp and shriek with joy at the thought of a ball after Mr. Bingley says, "When your sister recovers, you shall name the day."
   • After Miss Bingley says to Lizzy, "The pleasure is all mine," hiss at her.
   • Mr. Darcy's helping Elizabeth into the carriage certainly deserves an "Ahhh-ummmm!"
8. Mr. Collins arrives
   • Snore or yawn any time Mr. Collins speaks.
   • Show Mr. Collins your own exemplary vegetable!
   • When Mr. Collins says, "Indeed. Indeed. A very agreeable alternative," say, "Ewwww…."
9. Redcoats and ribbons "
   • HM: Drop your handkerchief so Mr. Wickham can retrieve it for you.
   • After Mr. Wickham says, "Yours, I believe," sigh with admiration and delight.
   • Giggle with Kitty and Lydia.
   • Examine your ribbons yourself, since Mr. Wickham can't be trusted.
   • With Lydia, show Mr. Bingley your ribbons for the ball.
10. The Netherfield Ball
    • Hum the theme to "Jaws" when Darcy follows Elizabeth into the ballroom.
    • Yell "Eek!" when Mr. Collins says, "There you are!"
    • After Mr. Collins says, "It is my intention, if I may be so bold, to remain close to you throughout the evening," give him another big "EWWW!"
    • "Ahhh-ummmm!" after Lizzy agrees to dance with Darcy.
    • Fan yourself after Lizzy and Darcy's dance.
    • Give Miss Bingley another good hiss after she says, "What interesting relatives you have."
    • Wave your wine glass carelessly about with Mrs. Bennet.
    • Giggle with Lydia and Kitty.
11. Longbourn after the ball
    • When Mr. Collins wants to "solicit a private audience with Miss Elizabeth in the course of the morning," utter a heart-rending, "Noooooo….."
    • Forget mouthing the words - give voice to Lizzy's "Papa, STAY."
    • Say "Headstrong, foolish child!" with Mrs. Bennet.
    • Honk with the geese.
    • After Mr. Bennet says, "…and I will never see you again if you do," give him a big whoop.
12. Leaving Netherfield
    • Miss Bingley merits one more hiss as she rides away.
    • HM: Help the Netherfield servants shroud the furniture with dustcovers.
13. Charlotte's announcement
    • Various animal noises in the farmyard.
    • Shower some more rain on Elizabeth with your squirt gun.
14. Hunsford and Rosings
    • Gasp when Mr. Collins says, "We received an invitation to dine at Rosings from Lady Catherine!"
    • HM: Shield your eyes from the naked bodies cavorting on the walls at Rosings.
    • After Lady Catherine asks Elizabeth if her younger sisters are out, exclaim, "ALL?!?" with Lady C.
    • Say, "Awwww…" in sympathy for poor Anne, after hearing, "So would Anne, if her health would have allowed her."
    • When Lizzy tells Colonel Fitzwilliam, "Prepare yourself for something very dreadful," hold your breath in anticipation.
    • HM: Shield your eyes and plug your ears through the entire church scene.
15. Elizabeth's second proposal
    • Use your squirt gun to contribute to the downpour.
    • HM: Offer poor Mr. Darcy your handkerchief to dry his wet face and hair.
    • HM: Soak up your drool from the sight Darcy's wet face and hair.
    • After Lizzy says, "My sister hardly shows her true feelings to me," say, "Uh oh…."
    • HM: Shield your eyes from the confusing dream-like sequence back at the parsonage.
16. Back at Longbourn
    • When Mr. Bennet says, "If she [Lydia] does, we'd be obliged to lock her up for the rest of her life," exhort him to "Do it NOW!"
17. Road trip with the Gardiners
    • Use your fan to emulate Elizabeth's windswept perch on a Peak.
    • HM: Shield your eyes from the shocking lack of clothing on the Pemberley statues.
    • When Darcy spies Elizabeth peeking in at the door, shriek, "Eeek!"
18. PAUSE for The Missing Scene
19. Pemberley and Lambton
    • "Hmmmm….." during Georgiana's glances at her brother and Elizabeth.
    • Back at the inn, Lizzy says, "Lydia has run away…" gasp, "…with Mr. Wickham," GASP!
20. Back home at Longbourn
    • Fan poor Mrs. Bennet in her distress.
    • "Such fluttering and spasms all over me!"
    • Use your wine glass to help show off Lydia's ring.
    • After Elizabeth exclaims, "Mr. Darcy?" to Lydia, gasp.
    • HM: Dab your eyes at the thought of parting with one's children.
21. Bingley, revisited
    • Toss your ribbons to Jane to put out of sight.
    • HM: Catch those tears of joy after Bingley proposes.
22. Longbourn, later
    • Yawn with Kitty while Mary reads from Fordyce's Sermons.
    • Cheer for Jane after she says, "No doubt poisoned by his sister."
    • HM: Shield your eyes so you can't tell that Lady Catherine is visiting at night.
    • Are the shades of Pemberley to be thus polluted?"
    • When Elizabeth sadly responds, "I am not," to Lady Catherine's impertinent question, say, "Awww…."
    • Whoop for Lizzy as she shows Lady C the door.
23. A morning stroll
    • Twitter with the early birds.
    • HM: Mop up all of that drool, pardon me, dew, as Darcy strides across the meadow.
    • Sigh once after Darcy says, "I never wish to be parted from you from this day on." Sigh again because he's just that wonderful.
24. Facing Mr. Bennet
    • Cluck with the chickens keeping Darcy company.
    • HM: Offer Mr. Bennet your handkerchief when he becomes emotional.
25. The end
    • HM: Shield your eyes from sappy American kissy-face ending.

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