] The basis for our argument is a bit thin. I just find it hard to believe that she should have been so "blind" to the overall picture, so "narrowsighted". . . .We are all guessing aren't we.

Faith, as the saying goes, is the evidence of things not seen but hoped for. :-) We may be all guessing, but I have to start with the presumption that things (and people) are what they seem to be until proven otherwise.